I don't know if you know this...but I am a bunny hill master

So I moved to Utah. And I found out when I got here that, and I wonder if anyone else has heard about this, but Utah has places where you can ski and snowboard. Crazy right? Well apparently it's a pretty big deal here. I mean they even had an Olympics here, with a child of light and everything!!

Friday, two weeks ago my co-workers wanted to leave work a little early and go to Main St. in Park City. (just a block down from our work) People were snowboarding and skiing. They had set up some rails and jumps in the center of town. As the snow was falling people were lining up to take their turn. This got me so hungry for surfing. I haven't had the chance in a while. Being in Utah I think it may be a while longer. I thought about being in a wave, carving back and forth and thought to myself "Snowboarding can't be that much different." So I texted Craig Tovey.

Chris: What does one have to do to try the snowboarding?

CraigT: Just get in the car with Gordon and me tomorrow.

Chris: Seriously

CraigT: Yeah we're going in the morning to Park City.

So I was set. Not only set but overwhelmed at how cool this was. Craig and Gordon, bless them, seriously bless these guys cause there awesome, had everything for me. Boots, board, goggles, googles, gloves, clothes and one free lift ticket. So the next morning I got up at 7, got in my car and drove down to Provo. Gordon was still in bed when I arrived and Craig was ironing the bottom of the snowboard, I don't get it but that's what you need to do I guess. So after pressing my pants I went up stairs to wake Gordon. (he was awake but still in bed, oh lovely, lovely Gordon) They suited me up and we headed to Park City.

It took a little bit of time to get the free ticket. There was some guy pissed that he didn't get something he thought he should have because rules don't apply to him. Anyway we got the ticket and headed over to the bunny slopes.

Now before I continue I want to impress upon my audience the indebtedness I have to Gordon Peterson and William Craig Tovey.

When I was asked by a friend to teach them how to surf, I would get them a wetsuit, a board and bring them to the ocean. This was pretty much the extent of my teaching. Actually I'm not that bad, I stay with them for a while but eventually get over it and go get my own waves.

Anyway with Gordon and Craig, these guys were with me every step of the way. They started me with one foot in the board, the helped me make turns to the left, to the right, to the front, to the back, then slide baby slide...wait.

No they were the best instructors you could imagine.

I hated getting on and off the lift. You do it with one foot in the snowboard, which is awkward. Then you have to hang in what appears to be the least safe ride at the carnival, the ski lift. That's okay because you're not belted in and there's nothing to hold on to.

The second time I came off the lift, I totally wrecked. I spilled myself all over the ground. What's good about that is there are people constantly coming off the lift behind you and since they're more than likely strapped into some board or ski, they have to maneuver pretty quickly to get around you. I loved it.

The first run of the day for me was a little difficult. I fell a few times and at first hated trying to get up from my butt. I decided to take the roll over and push up approach.

The second run I started making my turns a little more clean.

On to the third run, Craig and Gordon wanted me to go down a different hill, I was grumpy about that because it bled into the more advanced skiers.

The thing of it was Gordon and Craig were totally cool about it. They stayed close by, they made suggestions, supported me, it totally helped.

Craig had to pee on my fourth run, so Gordon and I went up by ourselves. That run I made it all the way down the bunny hill only falling once.

I know I totally mastered the bunny hill.

Gordon was proud of me and I wish Craig would have been there. As I got to the bottom of the hill I stopped for a minute to take it in. I was so happy with myself and at what comfort I made my turns. Sure they were a little sharp but I was having a great time. As I was basking in the greatness that was me I went to head toward the lift and where Gordon was and I totally lost my balance, fell to my butt and ripped my head against the ground. My goggles and beanie went flying and I was completely deflated.

As I was lying there, I thought, "no really the snow isn't cold. I can stay here for a little while."

I got up, dusted the snow off and tried to get to my goggles.

The thing about it is, when you don't want to be gliding down a hill, it's almost impossible to do the simple things like walk two feet and pick up your belongings. So after ten minutes of awesome effort, I got my goggles and headed back to Gordon.

Craig was now with Gordon and we went up the hill for one more run. I loved it. I want to do it again and again. They were so great. It was so generous of them. Sometimes I effing love those guys.

Anyway that's how I mastered the bunny hill.

Now I'm ready to take on Lane Myers on the K12. That's right John Cusack, I want Beth, or Monique, or the two Asian guys you race...or booger.